اَلسَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَبَرَكَا تُهُ
07 July 2012
01 July 2012
Treasured Moments
Sometimes, there comes a point in time where miraculous moments are made. It doesn't have to be grand, or amazing or notable - it just...is. Small talk can be miraculous. Even more so when the exchange seemed to be similar by nature of accident.
Know that whatever was exchanged will be kept safe and sound. But not all beautiful things stay beautiful especially if great care is not taken and caution is neglected.
Being only human, I too forget. So, I ask Him and you to continue reminding this frail person. And I will try to do the same.
For now, the most sensible action would be to refrain and restrain ourselves. Enemies lurk in every shadow and around every corner. Do not let our guard down even for a fraction of a second. The consequences may be fatal.
I now leave this post hanging, not unlike our last encounter...
22 June 2012
Redha
اَلسَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ وَرَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَبَرَكَا تُهُ
Kita selalu sebut pada lidah "Aku redha itu, aku redha ini," tapi sebenarnya redha itu dalam hati. Redha pada mulut memang senang, tapi nak redha dalam hati itu yang payah.
Waktu senang, mudah saja nak redha. Bibir tak henti terkumat-kamit pujian, lidah tak kering menyebut alhamdulillah. Inipun fitrah: apabila senang kita senang terima. Senang hati meredhakan keadaan.
Tapi bila di waktu susah, waktu sempit, lain ceritanya. Berapa ramailah sangat manusia yang cukup kuat hatinya (bukan lidahnya) untuk redha dalam keadaan sebegitu. Bila kematian ahli keluarga, bila kehilangan harta benda, bila yang diminta tak dapat. Di bibir memang tak nampak, tapi dalam hati siapa yang tahu? Terdetik untuk sesaat kata hati "Kenapa aku?" "Ini tak adil" "Balik balik aku yang kena" semuanya dalam sedar tak sedar menuding jari pada Allah.
Putus asanya bukan main nyata. Tapi tak hairanlah, kerana dalam Quran pun ada sebut sifat manusia yang suka kebaikan menimpa tetapi mudah putus asa dalam diuji [41:49]
Kita semua tahu segala sesuatu itu datang dari Allah, tapi kita mudah lupa terutamanya apabila dalam kesusahan. Inipun diterangkan dalam Quran [4:78]
Jadi, berdoalah. Doa itukan senjata rahsia umat Islam :) [40:60] Kita kena belajar yakinkan diri, dan lagi penting yakinkan hati dengan janji Allah [3:160]
Seperkara lagi, kita selalu ucap "Allah is the best planner," tapi kenapa bila qadar & qada' Allah tak seiring dengan qadar kita, kita menjadi orang pertama yang mengeluh? Rezeki, jodoh pertemuan, kejayaan, kegagalan, itu semuakan urusan Allah. Kita hanya berusaha, doa & tawakkal.
Allah tak mungkin zalim. Betapa kuat usaha kita, begitulah balasannya. Cuma sesekali, kita rasa dizalimi kerana apa yang kita mahukan tak diberi dalam bentuk yang kita nak. Tapi ingat, ilmu Allah itu halus, Dia lebih tahu apa yang kita perlukan, bila masa terbaik untuk kita terima dan sebagainya [42:12]
So, mari kita didik hati supaya redha, jangan hanya disebut di lidah ya? Wallahua'lam :)
13 June 2012
Nonsense
When we are void of ideas, we need to expose ourselves to something new to get that fresh vibe, in order to reclaim the steady flow of words.
But all I did for the past fortnight of holidays was sleep, sleep and more sleep. To my body, this is pure bliss. To me, this is nonsense!
End of the first point.
The next point: conflict. To choose between fun and games and fun and games. Which one do I choose? Which must I choose? It may not mean any difference to you but when all you have is one month of holiday, it (the choices to be made on a daily basis) too becomes this: nonsense!
End.
But all I did for the past fortnight of holidays was sleep, sleep and more sleep. To my body, this is pure bliss. To me, this is nonsense!
End of the first point.
The next point: conflict. To choose between fun and games and fun and games. Which one do I choose? Which must I choose? It may not mean any difference to you but when all you have is one month of holiday, it (the choices to be made on a daily basis) too becomes this: nonsense!
End.
07 June 2012
What happened that night
See, he was very tired that day. He couldn't remember all the details but yeah, he was so very tired that day. But see, though he was very tired that day, he was restless the whole night. There was this little something that weighed heavily on his mind and on his tongues and on his frame. He wished so very badly that he could muster any courage to ask that one question to that one person. But see, big as the thing that forced his mind and his eyes and his body to stay awake, bigger still was the big big question: How will he do it? (If he ever will).
So then there's this thing people called Google, where you type things into it and ask questions and it will answer, or where you key in that half-forgotten quotes you half remember from books, movies, amazing people, dead people, fictional people, not very friendly people and this thing - this Google - tells you all about it. I would say that is enough about this whole Google thing, but you see, you can even drag and drop pictures even half pictures even half of a half of a picture and wise Mr. Google will tell you all about it. So enough about this whole Google thing.
Then, you see, he started asking Google about lots and lots of things he never thought of asking anyone before, and some things he did want to ask but couldn't find the right people to ask or if he did find the right people it was always with the not-so-right time, or if he did find the right people and the right time, it was always with the not-so-right place. You get the idea, right?
So drowned in his questions, he did not feel sleepy that night, although I must say his body must be all objections and objections because I swear I can hear his body having a yell at him for not letting his eyes and his fingers and his brains (he was thinking too much, I thought he must have grown two or three or four noggins that night) sleep. His heart did not complain though for it was used to working day and night pumping that red thing through his body. But his other heart was a different case, for it was fighting a different fight. It was yearning and screaming to get this done and over with.
This chaotic but silent war raged on for hours. The whole world was asleep in slumber land, but had this clash been audible, I'm sure the whole place would think its the start of another world war.
And you know how that in times of panic and anomie, people just could never think straight? He was thinking all bends and curves and junctions that night. If there was ever a more bendy and curvy thing I don't know what it is.
So, seeing as how bendy and curvy his mind was, it took him over four long hours to set things straight. He put his phone on the side table. He got out of bed. He walked five steps to the washroom and performed ablution. He then spread the mat used for prayers and did four rakaats of prayers. Two for asking for forgiveness and certain wishes. Two for guidance so that He may show him what to do. Four, in total, to calm himself.
Now not a raging inferno of emotions anymore, he sat on his bed. He had done his part and now all that is left is to wait. For a sign. Any sign. Tired of waiting, or maybe this was the first sign, he opened a translation of the Book. And there it was, a verse directly telling about the thing he wanted answered. By this time, you should have somehow realised how much better God is compared to Google. So, that's one question answered.
Now, the how. So he looked back at a web page he had read a few hours ago. He copied the link and was thinking it through for the last time. He knew there was no turning back. This was a once in a lifetime thing. If it succeeds, it should go well, God-willing. If he fails, well let's not go there shall we? The moment of truth. One more button to press and it should be over. He pressed it.
Only it was the wrong one. The one time he was sure of it, he had pressed the one button he had never once in his one life pushed. Even once!
And just like that, the second sign was given to him, smack dab in his face! In a way, and I'm very sure this is what was going through him then,"This is not the right way to do it. The decision was right, the first sign says so. But your methods are down right wrong."
What happened later was a series of incomprehensible words, ughs and argghs followed by a complete shutdown of his body system and a numb feeling in his body all due to being kicked in the ass by Lord Almighty. The end.
So then there's this thing people called Google, where you type things into it and ask questions and it will answer, or where you key in that half-forgotten quotes you half remember from books, movies, amazing people, dead people, fictional people, not very friendly people and this thing - this Google - tells you all about it. I would say that is enough about this whole Google thing, but you see, you can even drag and drop pictures even half pictures even half of a half of a picture and wise Mr. Google will tell you all about it. So enough about this whole Google thing.
Then, you see, he started asking Google about lots and lots of things he never thought of asking anyone before, and some things he did want to ask but couldn't find the right people to ask or if he did find the right people it was always with the not-so-right time, or if he did find the right people and the right time, it was always with the not-so-right place. You get the idea, right?
So drowned in his questions, he did not feel sleepy that night, although I must say his body must be all objections and objections because I swear I can hear his body having a yell at him for not letting his eyes and his fingers and his brains (he was thinking too much, I thought he must have grown two or three or four noggins that night) sleep. His heart did not complain though for it was used to working day and night pumping that red thing through his body. But his other heart was a different case, for it was fighting a different fight. It was yearning and screaming to get this done and over with.
This chaotic but silent war raged on for hours. The whole world was asleep in slumber land, but had this clash been audible, I'm sure the whole place would think its the start of another world war.
And you know how that in times of panic and anomie, people just could never think straight? He was thinking all bends and curves and junctions that night. If there was ever a more bendy and curvy thing I don't know what it is.
So, seeing as how bendy and curvy his mind was, it took him over four long hours to set things straight. He put his phone on the side table. He got out of bed. He walked five steps to the washroom and performed ablution. He then spread the mat used for prayers and did four rakaats of prayers. Two for asking for forgiveness and certain wishes. Two for guidance so that He may show him what to do. Four, in total, to calm himself.
Now not a raging inferno of emotions anymore, he sat on his bed. He had done his part and now all that is left is to wait. For a sign. Any sign. Tired of waiting, or maybe this was the first sign, he opened a translation of the Book. And there it was, a verse directly telling about the thing he wanted answered. By this time, you should have somehow realised how much better God is compared to Google. So, that's one question answered.
Now, the how. So he looked back at a web page he had read a few hours ago. He copied the link and was thinking it through for the last time. He knew there was no turning back. This was a once in a lifetime thing. If it succeeds, it should go well, God-willing. If he fails, well let's not go there shall we? The moment of truth. One more button to press and it should be over. He pressed it.
Only it was the wrong one. The one time he was sure of it, he had pressed the one button he had never once in his one life pushed. Even once!
And just like that, the second sign was given to him, smack dab in his face! In a way, and I'm very sure this is what was going through him then,"This is not the right way to do it. The decision was right, the first sign says so. But your methods are down right wrong."
What happened later was a series of incomprehensible words, ughs and argghs followed by a complete shutdown of his body system and a numb feeling in his body all due to being kicked in the ass by Lord Almighty. The end.
20 May 2012
Eyes Your Twist
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14 May 2012
Carved of Weed
When you write with thoughts, often times those written thoughts are poisoned by the logic, the reasoning that we hold. But when you write without a second's thought, guided by pure unconsciousness, your fingers deftly stroking the keyboards, your hands flying across the pages faster than your eyes can look and your brain can see, then you are truly writing...
All people are born with this talent, I believe. That is why, and this is a mere deduction of mine unsupported by any claims, everyone without the exception of anyone can and will burst out when they reach that point at which no amount of patience can hold, that which no power except the Heavens can withstand. The boiling point of the human heart.
In that moment, words flow out at remarkable speeds, pouring layers upon layers of nothingness on all around. In that moment, objects fly, tears cry, lips split, ears and eyes pry. In that moment all logic and thoughts are abandoned. In that moment, we are truly writing...
On paper, on screens, on parchment, on weeds. We are all artists of different trades and skills. And like all good artists, no one understands them, nor the nature of their work. With that note, it's no wonder that: one man can never understand another man.
All people are born with this talent, I believe. That is why, and this is a mere deduction of mine unsupported by any claims, everyone without the exception of anyone can and will burst out when they reach that point at which no amount of patience can hold, that which no power except the Heavens can withstand. The boiling point of the human heart.
In that moment, words flow out at remarkable speeds, pouring layers upon layers of nothingness on all around. In that moment, objects fly, tears cry, lips split, ears and eyes pry. In that moment all logic and thoughts are abandoned. In that moment, we are truly writing...
On paper, on screens, on parchment, on weeds. We are all artists of different trades and skills. And like all good artists, no one understands them, nor the nature of their work. With that note, it's no wonder that: one man can never understand another man.
11 May 2012
Inner Demons
They try to claw their way out. Forever scraping at the walls of your heart, threatening to burst at the seams. In their eyes, a sadistic look of insanity and longing - a longing to rein free, free of my weak control. The keys to this cage? In my sweaty palms. Separating them from freedom? An arms-length of wilted, scarred and charred limb. My limb!
Inner demons. In my wake they are nightmares. In my nightmares they wake.
Inner demons. In my life they are death. In my death they come alive.
Inner demons. In happiness they bring woe. In my sorrow, they are happy.
So how do I escape? I don't! Someone once told me to fight fire with fire. So, a demon too I will become. Let's see who's the worst of 'em all!
But no. I do not wish for this spark to turn into an inferno. Instead, I will cool it off with water. Water. The essence of life. The image of purity. The one thing that could fight off the heat. Do I drink it? I may as well. Do I drown myself in it? I could. Or do I throw it into the pits of hell where my inner demons reside? What use will it be to them...when the only demon I see is me. For keeping the evil locked up in the first place. For defiling this once sacred place with horrors best left unspoken. For turning away from myself, the real inner demon...
Inner demons. In my wake they are nightmares. In my nightmares they wake.
Inner demons. In my life they are death. In my death they come alive.
Inner demons. In happiness they bring woe. In my sorrow, they are happy.
So how do I escape? I don't! Someone once told me to fight fire with fire. So, a demon too I will become. Let's see who's the worst of 'em all!
But no. I do not wish for this spark to turn into an inferno. Instead, I will cool it off with water. Water. The essence of life. The image of purity. The one thing that could fight off the heat. Do I drink it? I may as well. Do I drown myself in it? I could. Or do I throw it into the pits of hell where my inner demons reside? What use will it be to them...when the only demon I see is me. For keeping the evil locked up in the first place. For defiling this once sacred place with horrors best left unspoken. For turning away from myself, the real inner demon...
09 May 2012
A Brighter Future
Many of us are in that particular stage of life at which we look deeper into our minds, and often times think: where are we going?
Well, if you are in that stage, then good for you. If you're not, there can be three possibilities: you are too young (yet to have reach this stage), you are too old (the time has passed) or you just don't give a damn where you stand tomorrow. All three are quite bad. Seriously.
First thing to note: there is never a too early in life. You either make it or not. If you are young, then it is all the better for you to plan ahead because logically speaking, you have plenty to look forward to! Do not ever ever think that you are too young for anything! (Anything good and productive that is...)
If you are too old, then what's there to stop you from being a little bit more optimistic about squeezing that final strand of willpower you still have to do some good before you die? You never know the value of a deed until it has been done. Even then, some deeds' value are never known. Whatever the case, just do it! Our Lord judges us not on how much we did, but on how much of effort was put in to do it in the first place.
And, if you don't care, then luck be with you. There is nothing I can do for you. You are literally digging a grave of your own. Rest in peace..
I know that the prospect of planning for something so volatile, so uncertain is daunting in the least but hey, we are not God. In the end, His plan will prevail. Then why bother to plan you ask? Because if your plan is in line with what He planned, then you have reason to be happy. And if your plan does not coincide with His, you'll have reason to think, ponder, accept, learn. And eventually, be happy.
So start planning today! Start planning for a brighter future. And one last reminder: When you think tomorrow looks bleak, remember this: the earth is never bright on both sides.
Don't you think you're standing on the wrong side of the globe? Or maybe, just maybe, the light has not shone on your side. Yet :)
Well, if you are in that stage, then good for you. If you're not, there can be three possibilities: you are too young (yet to have reach this stage), you are too old (the time has passed) or you just don't give a damn where you stand tomorrow. All three are quite bad. Seriously.
First thing to note: there is never a too early in life. You either make it or not. If you are young, then it is all the better for you to plan ahead because logically speaking, you have plenty to look forward to! Do not ever ever think that you are too young for anything! (Anything good and productive that is...)
If you are too old, then what's there to stop you from being a little bit more optimistic about squeezing that final strand of willpower you still have to do some good before you die? You never know the value of a deed until it has been done. Even then, some deeds' value are never known. Whatever the case, just do it! Our Lord judges us not on how much we did, but on how much of effort was put in to do it in the first place.
And, if you don't care, then luck be with you. There is nothing I can do for you. You are literally digging a grave of your own. Rest in peace..
I know that the prospect of planning for something so volatile, so uncertain is daunting in the least but hey, we are not God. In the end, His plan will prevail. Then why bother to plan you ask? Because if your plan is in line with what He planned, then you have reason to be happy. And if your plan does not coincide with His, you'll have reason to think, ponder, accept, learn. And eventually, be happy.
So start planning today! Start planning for a brighter future. And one last reminder: When you think tomorrow looks bleak, remember this: the earth is never bright on both sides.
Don't you think you're standing on the wrong side of the globe? Or maybe, just maybe, the light has not shone on your side. Yet :)
04 May 2012
Vacuum Vakum
Oh, no! Why the sudden change? And all at once too! I cannot stop it, I need not stop it.
***
They say the human heart is the most illusive organ in our body. I must agree. You cannot see it, but you can't stop looking for it. You don't smell it, but you can't stop following its scent. You cannot hear it, but you listen to it all the time. You cannot even touch it, but you find ways to hold on to it.
People in general have been trying to understand its inner workings and mechanism but I'd have to say none have but all doomed to fail albeit successfully.
Weird creatures we are indeed. Looking for that which cannot be seen, yet refusing to believe in Him who's Will can be seen all around. Arrogant fools we are too!
Yet, we puff our chest and hold our nose up high claiming lies after layer of lies: "I have discovered this and that thanks to my wonderful intelligence and amazing brilliance." I say this: "You have not discovered anything but nothing. You have merely found someone else's unfounded findings. And logically speaking, you did not find that big brain of yours nor the knowledge you so proudly claim to be yours. It was given to you."
So be humble instead. All knowledge came from Him, thus nor you nor me nor anyone has the right to claim rights over knowledge that was not yours nor mine nor anyone's in the first place. So suck it up!
What was easily given to you can be taken, ripped from you just as easily. Maybe easier. You know what they say, "To destroy is easier than to build" So remember. The feelings in your heart are also given as a gift for you. So treasure it well. It may not be there the next time you look.
But so long as it is there, keep a gentle reminder to not abuse and misuse it. The vacuum has been here for some time. Let us fill it with things pure and good, not the other way around. Lest you prefer to be sucked into the void..
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